Honour Yourself

Do you have trouble taking yourself seriously?  Do you second guess yourself after you get “feedback” from others?  Do you struggle with thinking of whether you are good enough to have this that or do something you always wanted to do?

 Many of us do not value ourselves and who we are.  We have intrinsic worth, no matter what we have or have not done in our lives.  And all of us have an interesting story to tell (whether we see if our not) as we have all had different experiences that have shaped the person we are.  Even if these experiences are ‘bad’ or negative that can often engender reflection as a way of working through the trauma and sometimes a full turn around in our life journey can occur (for the better).

I so often see people comparing themselves to others and falling short in their own eyes.  You must understand even those people who seem to have it all still struggle, as to be human is to suffer to one degree or another.  If you live long enough you will see those you love pass away, a failure in business or work, even a health diagnosis which hits you at our core.  However, just like the beautiful experience of a breath-taking sunset, the birth of a child, the smile of an elderly relative, these events inevitably shape us and can potentially make us better humans, if we only allow the pain and beauty to merge in our souls. 

It is a choice to either open up to the magic of life or to be trampled down by the vicissitudes of it.  

Here are some tips to help be kinder to yourself:

·        Take time in nature. It might be a cliché, but alone time can be very nurturing.  Appreciate all the sights and smells around you. Sometimes we need to lose ourselves in something in order to come back to ourselves.

·        Say no to things you don’t want to do.  Stop putting other people’s needs over your own.  There is no need to feel guilty – you need to nurture yourself.

·        Look in the mirror and say “I love and appreciate myself just as I am”.  If you find that too hard to do, give yourself a hug instead and say those words. 

·        Break your routine. Challenge yourself to try something you always wanted to do but have either put it off or did not really believe you could do.  Even if it is for half an hour, you might surprise yourself.

·        Develop a spiritual or meditation practice – spending time in quietness or prayer and meditation can give you peace (that will permeate your non-meditation time) and improve your wellbeing.  It also helps develop your intuition - you quiet and space to bring the gentle voice of your soul forward.

·        Stop criticising yourself (and others).  Start with little things that upset you like someone driving slowly in front of you or someone at work ignores you.  Realise that it is not a personal slight; the person concerned may be having a difficult time in their life. Since you don’t know, give them the benefit of the doubt.  Someone might do the same for you when you are having a bad day.  After a while, changing your thoughts like this will become second nature and you will be more at peace.

·        Cultivate a spiritual practice of connecting to the Divine/God (or whatever you like to call the energy that runs through everything in our universe) through contemplation and self study. There are many wonderful spiritual books that can assist, like The Untethered Soul by Michael Singer. You will understand that you have the divine spark within you; the spark that animates all things and that are a valuable soul who deserves respect and appreciation and you matter!

Many blessings and Namaste